I love her yet I've never met her

The greatest thing about the internet is Lori Rooney. She is not a celebrity. She is not a friend of mine (other than the "friend of a friend" variety). She is just a mom who writes a blog. And I crave her entries like I crave chocolate. She is an exceptional writer, mother, teacher, and human being. Read her blog and you will love her too.

Read this blog. If you can, donate $5 or $10 or whatever you can to help the Rooney family travel to Ethiopia to bring their daughter home. Your donation also enters you into a cool contest to win a gorgeous handmade doll.

http://ourownrooney.blogspot.com/2010/11/ode-to-my-friend-and-chance-for-you-to.html

Reflections on 40 days of blogging

Technically, yesterday was the last day of my self imposed 40 day blogging challenge. Except that I didn't post yesterday, nor did I post the day before. Oh well, sometimes you go out with a bang, sometimes with a whisper, sometimes... nothing.

A few weeks ago, when I missed posting for one day, I was wracked with anxiety and disappointment. Now, not a big deal. So I missed 3-4 days of the 40. I also posted twice a day on several occasions. It's a reflection of my life goal: BALANCE.

I learned a lot in the last 40 days.

1. I am more private with information than I am with feelings.
2. Blogs are more interesting when they include photos. But my sense of privacy doesn't allow me to include photos of myself or any of the people in my life on my blog. Therefore, my blog will never be as interesting as it could be.
3. 40 days really does cement a habit. I definitely had the need to blog, even when time did not allow me to sit in front of a computer.
4. I never once ran out of material to write about, only time.

I also discovered that the blogs I truly love have one of these qualities in common:

a) Challenge: I love when there is a specific challenge or goal, such as the "Julie & Julia" blogger's goal of cooking every dish from Julia Child's cookbook. I love The Uniform Project ( www.theuniformproject.com ). Sheena wore the same dress every day as a statement about sustainable living, creativity, and as a fundraiser. She just finished her year of daily blogging today. Before I started this challenge, I was desperate to come up with a challenge of my own, but finally conceded that the simple challenge of writing something every day while also raising children, etc, was more than enough on my plate. Still, I dream of someday finding that specific goal that lights a fire under me.

b) Emotion: Authentic emotion. I find it all the time in my friends' blogs, and particularly on the blog: ourownrooney.blogspot.com

c) Quantity: Yes, I do prefer my bloggers to post often. It's a drag checking back again and again, only to see the same old post up for days or weeks on end. However, will I continue to post daily? I don't know.

d) Inspiration: It's always fulfilling to read a post that makes me want to do better. I don't know if this qualifies as a blog, but check out www.TheHappinessProject.com .

e) A combination of a & d: Philanthropic posts get me every time. I am committed to my friend Norm's Facebook group "Kenya Spare a Camera?" which chronicled his month volunteering at an orphanage in Kenya and really brought to light the fact that people can get together and make a difference! I adore http://www.MotherBearProject.com and the phenomenal woman who created it, Amy. Ditto http://crafthope.com .

I'd love to hear about the sites that YOU love, too!

So, there you have it: I have no bold declarations, no new challenge, no promises to blog every day... nothing new. I do plan on keeping this little thing going for the time being, and will always welcome your thoughts.

Middle age

I love magazines and have subscribed to several every year for as long as I can remember. 10-20 years ago, I subscribed to Vogue, and Harper's Bazaar, and Allure, and Elle. Young single girl stuff- fashion, beauty, frivolity. Today, it's Real Simple, and Parenting, and the Oprah magazine.

It's official: I'm middle aged.

Bad at math

I have never been great at math. Full disclosure: I failed math in 10th grade, and had to repeat it the following year. For an otherwise straight A student, this was beyond humiliating. I ended up kicking butt the second time around, but this failure was enough to scar me for life. I carry that F like a scarlet letter, branding me as forever bad at math.

It turns out that I'm pretty good at real life math, except for when it comes to time management. The little one has been sleeping through the night for 2 weeks now, which is wonderful beyond measure. I have been waiting for this extra time at night for nearly 3 years. But now my to do list has swelled to simply unreasonable proportions. I have 2 hours after the kids go to bed and before I should go to bed in order for me to be well rested.

Instead, I'm trying to cram every little thing I ever dreamed of accomplishing into that time slot. Watch TV/movies, exercise, clean the kitchen, organize the kids' toys, pedicure, bath, laundry, fold laundry, clean the bathrooms, empty the trash, knit, pore over cookbooks, fundraising for the school, Facebook, thank you cards, wrap gifts, email, blogging... So now I'm going to bed later than ever before and getting less sleep than I should... And all I really wanted was some more sleep.

I guess I really DO suck at math.

"She's so HAPPY!"

Very often, when we are out in public, a perfect stranger will comment about my little one, "She's so HAPPY!" I'm always confounded as to how it was intended. A compliment? An observation?

I'm super-ultra-mega-sensitive about my kids and about people's perceptions of them, so I often feel slighted by this comment. To me, its something people say about a severely special needs child for whom they have no other compliment. "But she's so HAPPY!" Like telling an obese girl she has a pretty face, the implication is that there is something wrong with everything else.

I know I sound crazy, and I do cop to having too thin a skin about this issue, but think about it: we comment on the main positive we notice. When our big girl was a baby, everyone commented on her big eyes. It hurts me that no one sees my little girl and offers compliments on her beauty, because she IS beautiful.

That being said, I also recognize that my chief dreams for my kids are for health and happiness. Not for beauty and mediocrity. Truly, if they are healthy and happy, I am (mentally) healthy and happy. If the little one stays happy, I will be thrilled beyond belief. She is a joy to behold.

Even a stranger can see.

More Celebrity Crushes

1. Sharlto Copley- I would have bet money that a white South African would never make it on my crush list, but, well... never say never. If you haven't seen "District 9" yet, for the love of humanity, just see it already! I'm not a fan of sci-fi, and I watched it on a screen the size of my hand (on an airplane!), and I still laughed and cried out loud several times. Powerful movie, talented actor, hot guy crush.

2. Benjamin Bratt- Years after he won my heart on L & O, I still heart him, for obvious reasons. Gorgeous man & social activist. What's not to love?

3. George Clooney- Everyone who knows me knows that I hate to jump on a bandwagon, but... Is it too obvious to add George Clooney to my list of celebrity crushes? Its the equilvalent of saying that ice cream is my favorite frozen dessert. But speaking of dessert, that man is just yummy.

Inspiration

Feeling down, feeling sorry for myself, feeling overwhelmed by challenges... I drove past a church with one of those message boards out front:

"In the middle of chaos, there is hope".

Talk about timing!